What are ENFJs Afraid of?

Fear is a powerful force that can sometimes affect even the bravest individuals. ENFJs, despite their characteristic strengths, also have sources of anxiety. Let’s explore some things that can stir fear within their compassionate hearts and discover ways to overcome them.

Losing Control

Maintaining balance and a sense of control in their lives is something ENFJs excel at. The fear of losing control can be pretty significant for them. The thought of being unable to solve problems as they arise and the fear of losing independence and connection with their loved ones can be terrifying.

Tip: ENFJs should learn to acknowledge that some things will always be beyond their control. It’s important to practice letting go of the need to have all the answers and recognize that asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It is vital to focus on what they can change and trust in their ability to adapt and find solutions when faced with challenges.


ENFJs thrive on meaningful connections with others. Being alone for extended periods can make them feel empty and uninspired. Their dominant function, Extraverted Feeling (Fe), promotes happiness and strong morale in others so that solitude can feel uncomfortable and unfulfilling.

Tip: ENFJs should balance being with others and taking time for themselves. Discovering activities that bring them joy and fulfillment even when alone is essential. Engaging in self-reflection and exploring their thoughts and feelings can help embrace solitude as an opportunity for self-discovery and personal growth.

Unresolved Conflict

As natural mediators, the idea of being unable to handle conflict strikes fear into the hearts of ENFJs. Their exceptional interpersonal communication skills are central to their sense of purpose. The thought of being unable to ease tensions and support those around them can be unsettling.

Tip: ENFJs should remember that they cannot always resolve conflicts for others. Accepting that some conflicts are beyond their control and focusing on creating a supportive environment for open dialogue is essential. Encouraging others to express their feelings and needs openly while offering empathetic presence and guidance can make a positive difference.

Frustrated Expectations

ENFJs’ dedication to empowering others can sometimes lead to setting excessively high expectations for themselves and those around them. When these expectations are not met, it can be disappointing and exhausting. Concern for their future and the well-being of their loved ones can also be a source of fear.

Tip: ENFJs should set realistic expectations for themselves and others, allowing room for growth and imperfection. Practicing self-compassion and understanding that everyone has their journey is essential. Focusing on progress and efforts made rather than solely on the outcome and embracing mistakes and setbacks as opportunities for learning and growth can help overcome this fear.

Inadequate Understanding

ENFJs may fear lacking a deep understanding of details and drawing inaccurate conclusions from situations. They worry that their understanding may not be reliable enough to be of use to others. This fear manifests as a concern that they might not consider all the necessary aspects of a situation, leading to ineffective actions and an inability to offer meaningful assistance.

Tip: ENFJs should trust in their intuition and empathetic understanding of others. Seeking continuous learning and engaging in ongoing personal and professional development is crucial. Surrounding themselves with trusted individuals who can provide valuable insights and perspectives is beneficial. Remembering that their genuine care and compassion make a positive difference in the lives of those they touch is critical.

Fear is a natural part of the human experience, and ENFJS must acknowledge and address its fears. By understanding and confronting their fears, they can cultivate resilience and personal growth, continuing to impact the lives of those around them positively.